  |
||||||
|
|
         |
About
Us - Elizabeth I’ve been divorced 3 times. I have three children from my last two marriages. My first marriage was during my college years. Our divorce was sad, but amicable (no property or children involved) – my ex and I went out to lunch together after filing! My second and third ex’s were highly antagonistic and litigious. There were years of legal action in both cases, which involved prolonged, time consuming and costly defense proceedings each time. Although I came from a functional upbringing myself, in the three marriages I chose I’ve had to deal with drug addiction, alcoholism in two forms - dry drunk behavior and functional alcoholism, workaholism and Narcissistic Personality Disorder (PDF). In the cases of the second two divorces it took me about two years to get back on my feet emotionally, practically and financially each time. My life was in such hardship, particularly after my third divorce. My single household income as a teacher (I’m certified to teach Theatre, Math and Science) and as a theatrical lighting designer didn’t cover anything but the most basic, subsistence-level bills. I was both bread winner and housekeeper. I was husband and wife in my house and garden. I was mother and father to my three children. I had a perpetual to-do list a mile long. My kids suffered in many ways too and their lives will never be what I had wished for them. I was struggling; financially, practically and emotionally. During the first two years after my divorce I was on a subsistence survival level; simply trying to get through each day was all that I could manage. But that phase has passed, and it will pass for you, too! There is a saying I particularly like: you have to lose your life to find your life. And that’s what I did. Slowly but surely I got my finances under control, I reorganized my home (which I believe is symbolic of reorganizing your life), I built up my support team of professionals who in turn helped me rebuild my life, I made a point of investing energy into family and friends who in turn rekindled my energy (I can’t stress enough how important this support system is to you). The kids and I went to counseling. I made a huge an effort to place a layer of fun and adventure over the underlying hardship, and we became a new and happier family. Through this reinvention I came to be in a place where I could once again be concerned about enlightening my consciousness, could practice forgiveness and understanding, be on a spiritual path of self-discovery, and do my part, in my way, to help to change the world. I eventually came to a place where I was open to what the Universe now had in mind for me. Once I was ready for the message it was laid in my lap and I now have a meaningful and inspirational business helping other divorcees through their Transition Years (as I have come to recognize them). The idea started from a seemingly innocuous comment from my counselor. I was bemoaning the fact that I couldn’t support myself and my children on my single income as a teacher or in the theatre, when she said “It’s too bad you can’t do something with your math skills.” And from that one comment, slowly evolved the idea for Divorce Doula, Inc. Over the next six months the Universe kept throwing more and more ideas into my pathway (I have another favorite saying: I don’t get ideas, ideas get me). By the time I was finished with my teaching contract, I had a complete business plan, and here I am. And here you are too. I
hope you are beginning to realize that you are not alone and that there is
help. Divorce Doula’s 10
Point Plan can guide you through this time. This investment
right now will give you direction and security, and help you gain control
of the rest of your life. I want you to keep in mind that you are in a
transition phase and that you will get through it. If you act now, your
life, like mine, will be better than it was before.
Disclaimer The experiences described in each Divorce
Doula’s bio are her own, and do not necessarily reflect her ex-spouse’s
opinion of the situation. |
||||
|
|
||||||